Third Date Cooking

Seared Tuna with Sauteed Green Beans

2013-05-29T22:05:00.001-04:00

Yes I know this looks very close to my Tuna Tataki recipe but its slightly different (plus its just another example of how easy it is to cook tuna). The tuna was cooked a few minutes longer and unlike the Tuna Tataki recipe, it wasn't marinated ahead of time.

Seared Tuna Ingredients

1 lb tuna
Cajun/Blackening Seasoning
A little olive oil
Salt, Pepper

Cooking tuna may be the easiest thing to cook ever. Easier than improvising Mac n Cheese. Easier than cooking popcorn. And easier than Washington sports team winning in the post-season (too soon?).

Recipe Guidance

Coat the tuna with the olive oil, salt, pepper, and any seasoning of your choice
Turn a skillet (cast-iron or teflon) on High
Sear each side of the tuna for 1.5 minutes
Remove from heat
Serve

Sauteed Green Beans

A few handfuls of fresh green bean
1 Sweet Onion
Sesame seeds
Olive Oil
Salt & Pepper
Soy Sauce

Don't buy canned green beans. They're terrible. Canned green beans will not get you anywhere in life (don't even buy them for the canned food drives). Buy fresh green beans. Spend the 5 minutes painfully cutting off the edges - fresh crunchy green beans are awesome, trust me.

Recipe Guidance

Rough chop the onion
Heat the skillet at Medium-High
Add a dash of olive oil, throw in the onions, and cook until soft-ish
Add a little soy sauce and the green beans
Toss in some sesame seeds for kicks
Saute until green beans are warm but still crunchy (5 min or so)

No one likes salmonella

2013-05-06T09:58:00.000-04:00

The Lost Art of Chicken Thighs

2013-04-30T23:40:00.002-04:00

"They're cheaper than chicken breasts so they're probably not as good."

"I dunno...they look pretty fatty to me."

"I'm a breast guy, not a thigh man."

I'm not sure why chicken thighs have gotten such a bad rap these days, but for someone that's just starting out in the kitchen, they're one of the easier meats to cook.

Reason 1: They're forgiving - I'm about 15% scared shitless of cooking chicken for other people. Red meat you can undercook. Fish you can undercook. Chicken? Nope. And as a result, I tend to cook the shit out of it (which usually means it's dry). It's an irrational fear (and I know I'm being too self-critical); however, if I'm scared, then a young 24-year-old, trying to impress a girl, will be scared (well...or oblivious). Chicken thighs are forgiving, you can overcook them a little and they won't dry out.

Reason 2: They're sneaky - That dark thigh meat is naturally flavorful and the small, intertwined pieces of fat just add to that flavor. Everyone knows that a dry-aged ribeye steak has more natural flavor than a New York strip. Why? The beautiful beautiful fat marbling of course...

Bone-in chicken thighs? Even better.

With just salt, pepper, and olive oil you can rock a pretty solid meal. You don't have to go all la cuisine de français on her (spending a whole paycheck on random spices and aromatics that you'll use just once while the rest becomes a 4th-grade science project in your fridge). So the question is, why wouldn't you pick a food ingredient that's already helping you out?

Trim the fat!

Reason 3: They're cheaper - Between the $10 shots of Petron and the $15 Bear Fights, food have become marginalized by our alcohol habits. I get it and I know, I'm in the same boat. So get happy, chicken thighs are typically $2-$3 per lb cheaper than their counterparts.

Reason 4: They're healthy - I don't buy the "it's too fatty argument." 75% of us ingest pounds of sugar and fake sugar, devour fried balls of dough, and pretend pork belly isn't just a gloried stack of fifteen glued-together slices of bacon. If you're conscientious (read: hypersensitive) trim the fat and/or buy skinless. And for this "Age of Nutritionalism" (cue Michael Pollan) that we live in, settle down, they're as nutritionally equivalent as their chicken breast counterpart.

Chicken Thigh Ideas:
If you're reading this far, I'm hoping I've "inceptioned" you into buying chicken thighs. To help you out, here's a list of various meals that I've thrown together with a package of chicken thighs. In most cases, I've used what I already had in my pantry. Salt, pepper, and olive oil should always be staples. Red and white onions, garlic...maybe some ancho powder or Slap Ya Mama seasoning. BBQ sauce or soy sauce. An electric grill, a cast-iron skillet, or a just a motherfuckin' pot.

(Recipe links in the coming days)

Grilled BBQ chicken thigh w/ avocado, grilled onions, scallions on an onion bun. No pots, all on grill

My ultimate lazy man's, one pot, fake Southwestern chicken dish

Again, a one pot meal. Braised chicken in cast-iron skillet then roasted in the oven

Simmering chicken thighs in a reducing a white wine, red pepper & onion sauce

Simmered chicken thighs w/ caramelized red pepper and onions, wild grain rice, and yellow squash

Grilled chicken thighs with olive oil, salt, pepper, and Ancho seasoning

Tip of the Day: Clean your damn place

2013-04-19T00:43:00.002-04:00

Back in the day whenever I had to stay late for work, every-so-often our company would pay for dinner. Our project manager's view was that the standard cornucopia of vending machine goodies - Fritos, Smartfood white cheddar popcorn, and Cheetos - did more to stain fingers and keyboards than provide sustenance for tired brains. We would order delivery. Nearly always Thai. And nearly always from the same restaurant.

In retrospect, the black, ballistic-quality, circular plastic containers packed densely with thick wavy rice noodles, chinese brocooli, and sliced chicken provided more of a "coma-effect" than a "work-effect," but we ate it. It was damn tasty, and it was my only way of rationalizing the extra billable hours without overtime.

** Fast forward 7 years **

One of the worst things you can ever do for yourself is to read a county health code inspection list of failed local restaurants. Naturally, all your favorite places are on that list and it becomes an executioner's song for all of your perennial late night jaunts. It's almost as bad as this story (before I learned that it was just an urban legend).

So OF COURSE, my favorite, extended-work Thai restaurant was on it. Bugs. Roaches. Dirtiness.

...Fuck.

My mind was racing. "Was the number of consumed minced Pad See Ew bugs larger than the number of spiders that I've swallowed in my sleep?!?"

...Fuck.

Naturally I've stopped eating there.

(And before I get emails from the pundits out there, yes I understand that no one cooks in a sterile environment. Yes, I know that when I'm camping and grilling outdoors, a dropped steak on the ground just adds "protein"...so I know... I'm not advocating super-bug creating, antibiotic hand sanitizer land - I understand that, but it's still gross)

So how does this relate to cooking for a girl at your house, you ask?

CLEAN YOUR KITCHEN.

AND YOUR BATHROOM.

You may have spent days mustering up the nerve to ask her out, hours rifling through food ideas on recipes.com, and 5 minutes tending the microwave but that means nothing, NOTHING, if you don't clean your place.

You may be used to the post-shave scruff lining your sink, the hair on the bathroom tile, and the grease stains on the kitchen counter, but she's not. Its a new environment to her. Its like she's visiting your restaurant. You would never take her to a restaurant that had dirty bathrooms, used a single cutting board to cut both chicken and vegetables, and looked like a 3rd year college house. So why start now?

Clean your shit up. You've invested hours into this date, why ruin it with something so trivial?

Simple Cooking: Pan Fried Baby Artichokes Recipe

2013-03-20T23:43:00.001-04:00

Lemon, olive oil, salt and pepper.

None of this fancy sauce reduction bullshit. No cream. No whisks. No elaborate spices.

Pan-fried baby artichokes are legit. They'll make you look like a professional and they're balls easy to cook. Three steps: Prep. Boil. Fry. The biggest difficulty you'll have is finding them at the grocery story and then convincing yourself to buy them.

Although, they do look like scary little mother fuckers.... Don't feed them after midnight

Ingredients

Olive Oil
Salt and Pepper
Lemon (cut in half)
10-12 Baby Artichokes (Baby artichokes NOT the bigger, "regular" ones)

Like most things on this site you can modify this recipe and improvise. Add heat (cayenne) Or Mint. Instead of "Prep, boil, fry," try "Prep, grill" or "Prep, fry." Add small pieces of bacon. Top it with Parmesan cheese. Do whatever.

Recipe
1. Prep: Clean, shuck, and slice
The first time I tried baby artichokes, I didn't listen to the instructions about peeling off *all* of the dark, thick leaves. I was greedy. I thought that leaving more leaves meant more of the artichoke to eat.

Nope. Mistake. Tough spiky leaves aren't that tasty... And instead of having more to eat, I had less, like, um, zero.

Peel off the outer green leaves until you get to the softer yellow leaves inside
Take a serrated knife and cut off a half inch from the top and trim the bottom stalk so it doesn't look like a dead Christmas tree trunk
Slice them in half lengthwise

I peeled the center one too much, the right one was perfect

Capped and sliced. Ready for boiling

2. Boil
The goal here is to cook the artichokes just enough and therefore allowing you to easily crisp them in a frying pan.

Fill a small pot with water, salt the water, and squeeze half a lemon into the pot
Bring to a boil, throw in the artichokes, and reduce the heat to a light boil
Cook for about 3-4 minutes (until just tender but have some resistance against a knife)
Once tender, remove from the liquid and place on a plate. Lightly pat with a paper towel (not necessary but it helps fry them better)

Um...disregard the breaded smelts

3. Fry

Heat a few splashes of olive oil in a skillet over medium-high.
If you want, you can throw in a few pieces of finely chopped garlic, let the garlic cook for about a minute (until you can start smelling the garlic) (not a required step)
Add the artichokes to the skillet and fry them until they get crispy. (Roughly 3-4 minutes or until they're nicely browned)
Once crispy, remove, add some salt and pepper, and serve with the other lemon half

Getting crispy. As you guessed, its not an exact science

These were much better than my breaded and fried smelts*....

*I have a habit of buying new shit at the grocery store and trying to cook it. That night, it was smelts. It was my first time buying smelts. I've since decided that I don't like smelts.

Breaking out of the monotony of cooking (and dating)

2013-02-07T14:39:00.000-05:00

As guys, we have no problem buying the same pair of brown shoes over and over again. Our closet is lined with dark blue, light blue, royal blue, navy blue, and dark blue (again) of the same shirt in the same brand that we’ve been wearing since we graduated from college. We go with what works, what is comfortable, so why change a good thing?

We do the same thing with dating. The same go-to first date restaurant, the same go-to second date bar, and the same third-date, home-cooked meal. We're creatures of comfort, creatures of habit.

Different girl? Same restaurant.

Another girl? Same restaurant.

Third girl? Same restaurant.

I mean, if there was a frequent flyer program for our "first date" restaurant, we'd be nearing George-Clooney-Up-In-The-Air flight status (sans Vera Farmiga's sultry company).

But something happens when you keep going to the same place - You fall into a groove. And not necessarily a good one. The edge is gone. The excitement is gone. It just becomes another standard first date. And your energy reflects that.

There’s an easy fix though. Just go to another restaurant. Try something new. They all serve beer and wine. They all serve edible food. Looking for some new spots to check out? My girls over at Doing the District have an entire section dedicated to dating locales in and around D.C.

Things get a little more complicated when it comes to cooking, though. Let me explain.

***

A while ago, a girl playfully quipped, "You can cook for me but you can't cook me anything that I've read about on your blog."

She was 98% serious.

Well...balls.

I'm not an executive chef with years of "some" training de Français. I want to cook in my comfort zone. I need to cook in my comfort zone. However, I understand where she's coming from - It’s not that I've cooked that same meal before, it's that I've cooked that same meal before with somebody else.

The fix?

(Don't write a food blog?)

If it's the first time that you're cooking for her, don't worry about it. You're gonna be nervous (that's good, it implies that you care) and recipe/food exploration probably isn't the best idea. Rest on your laurels and cook within your comfort zone. The adrenaline of your first home-cooked date will provide enough energy. But mix things up a bit. She knows that you’ve blogged about cooking fresh salmon in that Asian soy marinade? Use the same marinade (because its fucking awesome) but use a different type of protein.

And then if you’re lucky enough to cook for her again (now that you're more relaxed), here are a few tips:

Follow concepts not recipes - You know that salmon takes 7 minutes to cook. Grill, bake, or saute it. Add lemon and butter or a Cajun dry rub. And then choose 1-2 vegetables from your arsenal of sides.
Try something where you have absolutely no fucking clue how to make (but tell her that and do it together) - Donning leather work gloves, I shucked live oysters with a cheese knife right after reading Google search results from "How not to impale oneself when shucking oysters." Some ideas include:

Exec-level: Hand-rolled sushi. Freshly-made pasta. Shucked oysters. Handmade Ravioli. Anything from Iron Chef.
Sous Chef: Homemade pizza. Grilled pizza. Live Maine lobster. Whole fish. Anything that takes 5 hours of broth making.
Novice: Stuffed Shells. Lasagna. Crock pot roast.

But more importantly (and in both of these scenarios) don't try to re-create memories. Our memories have a funny way of skewing themselves after the fact (positively or negatively). Chances are, if you go to the same place over and over, or cook the same meal time and time again, you're just going to end up disappointed. Don't try to re-live memories. Instead, create new ones in new places and with fresh ideas.

Singapore Chili Crab (my New Years Resolution)

2012-12-25T16:26:00.001-05:00

That is one beautiful 420 gram Chili Crab

From brick and mortar, family restaurants to hawker food plazas and chicken satay carts, my trip to Asia spoiled the hell out of me. The Singapore Chili Crab? Fucking amazing.

The whole crab is simmered in this amazing, sweet chili sauce and served alongside steaming white rice and fresh lime slices. Diving in hands-first, the shell easily breaks apart to unlock thick, juicy pieces of crab meat. Once the crab is completely dismantled (it's gonna look like you haven't eaten in days), continue your adventure by shoving spoonful upon spoonful of rice-chili sauce-crab bits goodness.

Thanks Asia…now I have a craving for Chili Crab and DC has ZERO Chili Crab places. I need my fix (like all things addicting, the crab is weighed in grams...). So now I'm determined to re-create this famous Singaporean dish.

Three days ago, I decided to make this my New Year's Resolution - to cook something completely out of my element.

Two days ago, I realized this is going to be a pain in the ass.

1) You can't buy the sauce, you have to make it. Variations range from including eggs to corn starch to ketchup. (I have zero patience for measuring)

2) And where am I going to find mud crabs? (Chesapeake Blue rule this region)

3) A lot of the recipes say to clean the innards of the crab first…. (There's absolutely no way I'm ripping open a live crab)

...You can negate on a resolution if you didn't make it on New Year's, right?

But I'm going to stick with it. Fueled with coffee and a full-nights sleep (wouldn't that be a perfect storm), I'm going to try and perfect the sauce. One recipe says you can boil the crab for two minutes before cleaning the insides (saving me from my conscious and PETA).

So there's one of my New Year's Resolutions, 6 days early.

But there's no way in hell I'm going to cook a trial run on the third date. And I wouldn't recommend doing it either. Maybe the eighth - bonne chance.

Swedish Glögg Recipe

2012-12-19T11:12:00.000-05:00

Like the U.S., the December holiday season in the Nordic region provides a warm welcoming of festivities, parities and general happiness. Without the indulgence of Thanksgiving and the availability of sunlight, November is a depressing month in Sweden (and most Swedes seem to use this time to flee south).

No idea why I bought a Swedish cookbook...

So as you can imagine, for the Ikea-loving, quiet and introverted Swedish culture goes, December is the winter month for letting loose (I'm told all hell breaks loose in the summer). Candles and Christmas lights line the snowy streets. Pepparkakor (gingerbread cookies) is consumed in mass quantities. And to say that glögg is their poison of choice would be an understatement.

"I was warned by some fellow Swedes at the beginning of December that, by the time January rolled around, I would be sick of Glögg. And I am. This past week, I had Glögg at work, Glögg for St. Lucia, Glögg for our Holiday Party, Glögg for our Holiday party dinner, and Glögg during a small Christmas party. I think my brain is swimming in Glögg..."

- Me, 12/16/2007, from an old blog post of when I lived in Stockholm

Glögg is essentially mulled wine. It's gløgg in Norwegian and Danish. Glögg in Swedish and Icelandic. Glögi in Estonian and Finnish. But all you need to know are these three things:

It contains wine.
It contains liquor.
It's served warm.

And like the whiskey-cider that we're used to here in the States, the warmth of the drink provides a false sense of sobriety security (you get drunk hella quick).

So here's my glögg recipe - graciously given to me by a Swede while I was living overseas. As she reminded me, making glögg isn't an exact science, so don't worry if you need to make a few substitutions.

Ingredients

1 liter of a hard liquor mixture (Brandy + Whiskey + Southern Comfort, Rum + Whiskey + Southern Comfort) - the world is your oyster.
3 liters of red wine (an inexpensive wine is fine and Target sells a great "vintage" box wine that seems to be the perfect size)
Christmasy Spices - Cinnamon sticks, cardamom pods, and whole cloves
Fruit Zest - The peel of an orange and perhaps a few lemon peels
Raisins and blanched almonds (you'll want a few of each in the cup when you serve it)
Sugar to dissolve into the pot if its too strong

Recipe
Create the Glögg Extract (1 week prior)

Combine the hard liquor, Christmasy spices and fruit zests into a large sealable container

If you're OCD, you can wrap the spices in cheese cloth for easy removal before serving

Store in a dark cool place for one week

Glögg (Day Of)

Combine the red wine and glögg extract (spices included) in a large pot
Heat up the mixture (but don't boil it because you'll start to kill the alcohol)
Serve

The lazy way - Ladle around the spices when serving, toss in a few raisins and almonds
The OCD way - Wrap all of the spices in a cheese cloth, throw in all of the raisins and almonds while you're heating up the mixture. Ladle the glögg, making sure to scoop up some of the raisins and almonds

Expert tips:

Soak the raisins a day or two ahead of time to make them really alcohol-fueled
Serve with Pepparkakor (gingerbread cookies) or Æbleskiver (Danish dessert, like our doughnut holes, but sweeter and much better)

Cooking Lessons from a Street Vendor in Thailand

2012-12-11T08:03:00.001-05:00

On a humid afternoon in November, I found myself slowly wandering through the outdoor food markets of downtown Chiang Mai, Thailand. A cornucopia of vibrant and enticing food stalls and souvenir stands littered the pathways as vendors competed for my business.

My stomach and brain have never had such a conflict...

Stomach: "Wow that sushi looks amazing"

Brain: "It's 10 THB ($0.33 USD) a piece. How long has it been sitting there? It's a 1,000 degrees outside. Don't be an idiot."

Stomach: "Oh! Tiny little quail eggs?!?!"

Brain: "Come on... Those look raw... RAW EGGS IN A FOOD STALL? Really, I mean REALLY?!?"

Stomach: "Mmmmmm fried shrimp...grilled squid... Oooooh Pad Thai..."

Brain: "Fine. Deal."

The shrimp and the squid were good; however, it was the Pad Thai that sealed the deal.

An inconspicuous food stand within a small market in northern Thailand ruined Pad Thai for me for a long, long time - it was some of the best Pad Thai that I've ever had.

40 THB ($1.31 USD) ruined my chances of finding comparable Pad Thai in DC.

Now to be fair, the mere allure and excitement of my surrounding environment certainly heighten my sensations and most likely, automatically enhanced the positive memories. So for "scientific purposes" (was this really the best Pad Thai ever?), I had to, you know, go back again...two days later.

But why this vendor? Why him among all of the other food stalls?

Bright vibrant colors and fresh looking ingredients

Colorful blue bowls with rich purple onions, bright orange shrimp. Fresh juicy limes. Freshly cut chives. Seeing those colorful ingredients was the foreplay of this dance and my mind was building together the meal before it was ever even made.

Color matters. It's not a deal breaker but rich vibrant colors are only going to help you - a rich sensory display to get her mouth watering.

Prep then cook

The cook wasn't chopping then sautéing then slicing then searching for spices, it was all in front of him, ready to go. So prep first. Lay it all out. The actual cooking part requires timing and (probably some concentration), food prep doesn't. So prep first and make her your sous chef.

Interactive cooking

Three aisles down, there were bowls upon bowls of Pad Thai. Sitting there, steaming hot, waiting to be purchased and eaten. I was certainly hungry so why didn't I just choose those pre-made dishes?

The Pad-Thai-to-ruin-all-other-Pad-Thai was made right in front of me...in like 3 minutes. It's awesome to see a cook in action. Sautéing a heap of onions, wilting the rice noodles. Egg cooking separately. A handful of chives, a scoop of dried shrimp, and a splash of sauce. It was art. 3-minute, 40-THB art.

Do the same when you have her over for dinner. In this reader poll, most dates wanted to see the person cooking the dinner. They don't want it to be 100% complete when the door is open. There's no build up. Have some appetizers ready and pour two glasses of wine. If she offers to be your sous chef, great. Otherwise, I'm sure she'll have no problem having wine and eating cheese and fresh bread as she watches a guy cook for her.

How to cook lobsters and not freak out the girl

2012-11-13T12:01:00.000-05:00

If your date is from the Northeast, chances are good that she's going to love this idea and will support your latest cooking endeavor. However even if she can tear through a pile of Chesapeake Bay Blue crabs with the best of them, in most cases, you're going to have to tread lightly. Cooking live lobster may be a delicate issue.

"Can you bring Old Bay to a lobster fight?"

But don't fret. Because who really turns down cracking open lobsters on a patio during a cool evening in October? And if she's not willing to get dirty cracking apart crustaceans, there's not a single girl on Earth that turns down lobster mac n' cheese.....

So keep reading to learn about how to boil and steam fresh lobsters (its as easy as cooking dried pasta) and also take note of three disaster possibilities:

Disaster Possibility 1: She's an avid pescetarian who gets outdoors, hikes, has a dog, and enjoys the occasional farmers market as well as a medium-rare filet mignon from time to time. However, SHE DETESTS KILLING THINGS. So surprising her with two boxes of semi-"awake" lobsters that you intend to boil to death will drive her away faster than fantasy football talk on a Tuesday.

Fix 1: Don't cook lobsters!
Fix 2: Put the lobsters in the pot just before she arrives. Lobsters will take 10 minutes to cook so your timing must be impeccable (you're playing with fire my friend)
Fix 3: Cook the lobsters earlier that day and make homemade (not Kraft!) lobster mac n' cheese that's topped with slightly-browned bread crumbs then baked and served in your favorite cast-iron skillet

The colander could save you

Disaster Possibility 2: You freak out. You like crossfit, hit the trail sporadically, and can throw a spiral better than Rex Grossman on a good day. You feel pretty manly.

But if you've ever hesitated about squashing a spider in your house with just a napkin, you may freak out. Picking up a feisty lobster while your inner yogi is screaming at you for boiling (or steaming) a crustacean alive, may end your night, ahem, prematurely.

Fix 1: Steam the lobsters. Take the colander out of the steaming pot, place the lobsters in the colander, cover with a lid, then put the whole thing back into the steaming pot. Migrate to the living room, pour the both of you a glass of wine, and return 4 minutes later. As a result, you won't have to deal with squirming lobsters in a boiling pot, by leaving the kitchen they'll be out of sight/out of mind, and when you come back they'll be dead and starting to look more like dinner.
Fix 2: Man up. Are you going to let these bottom feeders cock block you?!?

Disaster Possibility 3: She's allergic to shellfish.

Fix 1: EpiPen
Fix 2: You're an idiot for not checking her allergies ahead of time

Now that you've made it through the disaster scenarios, let's learn how to cook lobsters

Sweet sweet Maine lobsters

Ingredients:

4 1-1 1/4lb Lobsters
Salt
Butter
Lobster cracking tool
Optional Ingredients: Lobster Bib
Classic Sides: Red potatoes and corn

The two easiest ways to cook lobsters are to boil them or to steam them. People say you can grill them (parboil then grill) but this just seems to risky for a novice. There will be a slight difference in taste between boiling and steaming, but if this is you're first time, you probably won't notice a difference.

Lobsters should ALWAYS be alive before cooking
I found my large pot can hold two lobsters comfortably and I was perfectly content with a two lobster serving size. As a result, you may have to think about logistics if you're trying to cook 4 lobsters with 1 lobster pot

Boiling Lobsters

Salt a large pot of water (so it tastes like seawater) and bring to a boil

I seriously underestimated the time my watched pot took to boil; therefore, I recommend turning the pot on earlier and getting the water to a near boil. You can always turn the temperature down slightly until the right time

Place two lobsters into the boiling pot of water
Do not cover
Stir halfway through the cooking process

Happy steaming lobsters

1 1/4 lb lobsters will take 9-10 minutes
Remove from the pot and serve immediately with melted butter.

Steaming Lobsters

Put in about two inches of water to a large pot
Salt the water and bring to a boil
Put the lobsters in the colander, cover, and steam
Stir halfway through the cooking process
1 1/4 lb lobsters will take 12 minutes
Remove from the pot and serve immediately with melted butter.

The Maine Lobster Council website seems legit (because it says Maine and lobsters are from Maine) so go there for more information on cook times but also how to eat a lobster.

Soy-Glazed, Asian-Style Chilean Sea Bass

2012-10-23T10:57:00.001-04:00

Remember back in high school, when your best friend let you borrow his 3-month old, midnight blue Porsche Cayman so you could impress that varsity cheerleader? As the car knifed through the darkness, it was just you and her winding down the back roads behind your high school. The temperature hovered at a cool 50 degrees; the windows down but the adrenaline keeping you both warm.

You were driving a $52,000 car. You were cocky. But really, you were scared shitless - partly because of the car, but mostly because of her.

*This is not me, my best friend drove an Oldsmobile

At $19.99/lb, Chilean Sea Bass is like that Porsche sports car - miles above the plain and common tilapia (think Ford Focus) and even a step-up from that fresh, wild-caught salmon (think Audi A4). And like that midnight ride, you're going to be nervous. You're driving a Porsche Cayman (cooking Chilean Sea Bass) and it's balls expensive.

Yes I know - this is a big step and you have no idea what you're doing (did you even know how to drive a manual?!?). But trust me - there's a reason why its expensive, Chilean Sea bass is fucking amazing.

Why the High Price?
I like to think that I'm paying that higher price because this filet is going to help me along the way (like the Cayman). The thickness and high fat content make it difficult to overcook. It absorbs flavor like a sponge. It doesn't smell fishy and won't ruin your apartment. And best of all (without having to take a single cooking lesson), it tastes like butter and melts in your mouth.

Matt's Insights into Cooking Chilean Sea Bass
Whenever I cook a thin, flaky piece of fish like catfish or tilapia, I tend to flavor the fish using a combination of dry spices (blackening seasoning, salt and pepper or Cajun seasoning). I usually pan-fry the fish to emphasize the seasoning but also to maintain the delicate flesh.

Because Chilean Sea Bass is such a thick cut of fish, dry spices may not be able to really permeate through the entire fish. With Chilean sea bass, I want the fish to absorb the flavors of the simmering broth; therefore, the infused flavors are going to come from the cooking liquids. I feel like sea bass goes great in Asian-inspired dishes, so for this recipe/experiment I tried to focus on those flavors (in this case - soy sauce, onions, and pickled ginger).

Ingredients

2 6-8 oz pieces of Chilean Sea Bass
Olive Oil, Salt, Pepper
Soy Sauce
Something to dilute the soy sauce and create a light broth. (In this case, I think I used a little bit of cooking wine and water. But you could add some butter, half of a squeezed orange, or just water)
Fresh scallions - partly for flavor but mostly because I thought they'd look cool for presentation
Pickled ginger

Recipe Guidance
I cooked this dish awhile ago and naturally didn't write down a single step in the process. However, I took a bunch of pictures (see the end of the post), so I'm hoping that I can re-create the steps.

Skillet to medium-high, lightly saute the scallions in olive oil
After a few minutes, throw in a few slices of pickled ginger.
Place the fish into the skillet skin side up (The goal here is to lightly-sear the fish before simmering)
After 30-60 seconds or so, add the soy sauce and another liquid to help light the potency of the soy sauce
Let simmer for a 3-4 minutes
Flip (cover halfway to help the fish cook through) and simmer for another 3-4 minutes* (I can't remember exact times so you may have to run a Google search)
Uncover, check for doneness (it will be an opaque white and it should flake away in nice slices when you cut it with a fork)
And serve

Ideas for Sides
I could see Jasmine rice going well with this dish (especially if you've made a nice broth that can be sopped up by the rice). Add a vegetable (perhaps sauteed shitake mushrooms to stick with the Asian theme) and a white wine (maybe a Sauvignon Blanc).

In all honesty, I've only cooked Chilean Sea Bass a handful of times (and I'm usually winging it). But on every occasion, it has come out great - she will definitely be impressed.

Chilean Sea Bass & Sliced Onions

Olive Oil & Green Onions

Start face down. Add some soy sauce

Flip and Cook Longer

Cover to help cook through

Finished! Now add Sides

Tips for Pan-frying White Fish and a Cajun-Seasoned Haddock Recipe

2012-10-15T00:30:00.000-04:00

I just have a slight obsession with my cast-iron skillet. Therefore as a result, whenever I buy haddock (or catfish or snapper or tilapia), I jump at the opportunity to throw my 15lb cast-iron behemoth up onto the stove. And of course, the well-season skillet does wonders for locking-in and enriching the flavors of fish (and meat).

Pan-frying white fish is just another example of simple cooking that looks wayyy too impressive for the actual effort that you've put in.

Tips for Pan-Frying White Fish
1. Avoid "deep-frying" - There's a time when you can have too much olive oil (there, I've said it!). Be aware of how much oil you're putting into your pan. A little bit of olive olive oil goes a long way; your cast-iron skillet should already be nicely seasoned and too much oil will make your food too oily. A tablespoon or so should easily do the trick.

2. Use butter for that golden brown char - Olive oil... coconut oil... avocado oil... All excellent, healthy oils to use while cooking; however...sometimes (well maybe all the time) you just want the goodness of butter. Don't sweat it, a few tablespoons of butter isn't going to hurt and she won't notice.

3. Use dry seasoning instead of liquid marinades - Salt and pepper. Cajun-spices. Ancho chili rub. Blackening powder. I'm a big fan of using spices (rather than marinades) for delicate white fish. Liquid-based marinades overpower the fish.

Cast-Iron Fried, Cajun-Seasoned Haddock Recipe
Like most of my recipes on this site, most of these ingredients can be swapped out with others. My goal is for you to be comfortable just "winging it" after a few times.

Seasoned with a pre-made, Cajun seasoning

Ingredients

Haddock (or catfish or tilapia)
Cajun-Seasoning (or a creole or blackening seasoning)
Pepper or a dash of cayenne powder (for heat)
A few tablespoons of butter
Cast-Iron Skillet

Flesh side down at first

Steps

Unwrap haddock from packaging, rinse, and pat dry
Heat the cast-iron skillet to medium-high
Season the fish (see the picture below)
Throw the butter into the skillet
Place the fish (fleshy side down, skin side up) into the pan
Cook for about 6 minutes.

Flip once after 3 minutes or so.
Cover the pan for a minute or two if you're nervous the fish won't cook.
Remember, if you've found your baseline cook time, the fish is going to take less time than steak

Remove fish when the center is opaque
Serve with fresh lemon

Possible Sides

Pan-fried okra or fresh green beans
Sliced, roasted tomatoes
Quinoa or wild, long-grain rice
A crisp, cold white wine

That was a terrible display of spatula skills. Good thing this was just for me

Presentation Matters (...sorta)

2012-10-11T10:47:00.001-04:00

I can relate.

Whenever I cook for someone new, I'm nervous. Presentation is hardly at the top of my list. Remembering her food allergies.... cleaning my bathroom... finding suitable music... not burning myself.... ALL TAKE PRIORITY OVER PRESENTATION!

I know I'm not along here. I mean, guest blogger Katie completely forgot about her smoldering bread in the oven! I doubt she gave a fuck about whether or not the asparagus was perfectly angled at 47 degrees due west of the steak.

HOWEVER, if you're one of the lucky few that's made it past the gauntlet of things to really remember, feel free to give a little love to presentation. I've outlined how to do it below.

Keys to Presentation Love:

1. Provide a mixture of color. A while back I wrote a Tip of the Day about avoiding a monochromatic dish. What do I mean? For example check out the two pictures below:

Dish 1: Chicken penne pasta with pan-fried tomatoes, fresh Parmesan cheese, and homemade pesto
Dish 2: Cipollini pasta with wild caught shrimp served over a homemade seafood broth
Dish 1 looks much better, right? Colorful. Vibrant. (Even though the cipollini pasta dish tasted better)

Wow, that is some sexy looking pasta.

What is this UPS uniform day?!? Where's the color?

2. Taking a note from Nordic design, I'm a big fan of simplicity and clean lines. A clean white plate or solid black bowl - Let the food be the star, not the plate.

I bet you forgot about the white plate.

3. Sit at the table (turn off the TV) and attempt to make a decent place setting. You don't have to borrow family heirloom china from Mrs. Robinson in Apt 732 but set the table. Napkins (NO, not paper towels...what are you, 19?), water glasses, wine glasses, silverware - you get the idea.

4. Soft lighting - There's a reason photographers prefer to shoot on cloudy days rather than mid-day with a harsh, overhead sun. Soft lighting, candles, or floor lighting makes everyone and everything look better. If you haven't installed that $5 dimmer light switch yet, floor lighting is much more appealing to the eyes than overhead lights.

On Chopped, they'll ax you if you forget to zigzag sauce across the plate. And if you're competing on Iron Chef, presentation is worth a third of your final score. These four simple pointers will help you with presentation at Chez Vous. So if you can throw in some presentation love, go for it. Otherwise, don't sweat it. You're already cooking for her and she's already loving that.

Memoirs of an (Electric) Grill

2012-09-20T10:35:00.000-04:00

You know how girls have adopted that bent-knee, 80-degree-elbow picture pose? Yeah...I seem to have adopted the right-hand-tongs, left-hand-grill-handle pose.

You know how parents take monthly photographs of their newborn next to a stuffed animal? It's like that and while I'm neither an infant nor slowly getting larger than the propane grill next to me, I feel like the pose hasn’t changed, the smile has never waned, and my excitement to turn skewered meat into a feast has never disappeared.

It's ridiculous.

During the warm summer months and early fall, the grill beckons me like a moth to a flame.

I will be the first to admit that up until last fall, I was skeptical of electric grills. Just hearing the words "electric grill" conjured images of George Foreman's vise-like, metal teeth of meat-death decimating a rib-eye steak to well-done. But due to my county's "concerns" (regulations) of residents torching apartment complexes with charcoal and propane, I was forced to go electric.

And of course, I was clearly mistaken. The electric grill is awesome for that quick, home-from-work, 10 minute instant dinner as also that no-flare-from-dripping-fat, bacon cooking extravaganza you crave. You don't have to worry about flare ups. You can set a dial to get the EXACT temperature you want and as a result, you know EXACTLY how long to cook a piece of protein (or vegetable).

Set the heat setting to 4. 5-minute preheat. 8-minute salmon & zucchini. DONE.

So you can imagine my sadness when my electric grill died last month. At a $35 purchase price, my electric grill has been My GREATEST CRAIGSLIST PURCHASE EVER... (I definitely got my money's worth - I grilled 3x a week for 5 months straight).

But fuck, I'm depressed it's gone.

And as a result, I've lost somewhat of my luster to cook. Missing the simplicity of grilling has sucked the life out of my cooking routine. It’s a fun, simple way to cook...and best of all it’s great for beginners. Need more convincing?

Impromptu grilling sessions aren’t cut short when you realize you don’t have charcoal or propane
There are no flare-ups
You can get into a routine on cook times
You can grill salmon outside instead of smelling up your house
You’ll want to start grilling everything

Hooked? Need recipe ideas? Here are my other posts about grilling:

Grilled Salmon... All. The. Time.

2012-08-31T08:52:00.001-04:00

Over this past summer (having been influenced from a recent electric grill purchase), I cured my addiction to kale and, for better or worse, switched my focus to cooking salmon. And it wasn't salmon once a month. Or even twice a month. It was All. The. Time.

I'd buy a pound of salmon at the beginning of the week, come home, cut it into thirds (one-third seems to be the perfect serving), put it in zip-lock bags, and have it for dinner or lunch over the next few days.

I'd always buy wild caught. It tastes completely different. It looks significantly better. And for me, there's just something about millions of salmon stuffed in a giant bathtub that just isn't very appealing. (Harris Teeter sells Wild-Caught Salmon for $10.99/lb - less than a Irish Bomb...)

AND Salmon is incredibly easy to cook! Just remember my adage elsewhere on this site - "If you under-cook fresh salmon, you end up with sushi. If you under-cook pork or chicken, you're fucked."

Because it's easy and simple, I can't even give you a good salmon "recipe." Instead, here are salmon grilling "guidelines" and just make it however the eff you please.

Grilled Salmon However-the-Eff-You-Please

Ingredients

The Freaking Awesome Asian Marinade

Wild-Caught Salmon (rule of thirds!)
Olive oil, walnut oil, hazelnut oil, coconut oil...but really just some kind of oil
Seasoning
- Salt & Pepper
- Cajun Seasoning
- Blackening Season
- Or Ancho Chili, Salt, and Ginger
- Or whatever is in you cabinet
- Or this bad-ass Asian Soy marinade that I discovered

A Perfect Medium-Rare Salmon

Grilling Guidelines

I have an electric grill, so I usually fall into a pattern of a 4 out of 5 heat setting for 7 minutes which usually ends up being about medium/medium-rare
I don't have a charcoal or a propane grill, but I would guess it would be about the same time - medium-high heat but just watch for flare ups

Grilled Sides
Another thing that I've learned from my salmon addiction is that grilled vegetables are amazing. Grilled zucchinis and asparagus are phenomenal. Slightly charred, grilled red peppers...excellent. Leeks, onions, chives...sure, why not?!?! And surprisingly, there are only three things you EVER have to put on grilled vegetables. Olive Oil. Salt. Pepper. (You can thank me later).

Anyways, Happy Labor Day. I've put up some grilled salmon photos for inspiration.

Grilled Salmon with Leeks, Portabella Mushrooms, and Zucchini

Grilled Salmon and Asparagus

Grilled Salmon with Fresh Tomatoes

Deconstructed Guacamole Recipe

2012-08-30T14:54:00.000-04:00

"Deconstructed" is such a foodie term.

I hate it.

It's like haricot verts (greens beans), pommes frites (French fries), or squab (pigeon).

So it pains me to title this "Deconstructed Guacamole" but "Chunky Guac" or "Unsmashed Guac" or "Ran-out-of-time-to-smash-it Gauc" just didn’t have the same ring.

Maybe "Al Fresco Guacamole"?

***

I love eating outdoors (except in the DC humidity of July and August, and the winter months of December and January, and the rainy month of April) BUT when it is pleasant, there's nothing better than fresh appetizers and a cold crisp beer with sitting on a balcony with good company.

And naturally "deconstructed" guacamole is a perfect outdoor-balcony dining candidate.

It’s fresh.
EVERYONE loves guacamole.
And by leaving the ingredients whole, you avoid that "blah" look of green mush.

So grab a bag of scoops, a sixer of Coronas, and follow this recipe below:

(Disclaimer: it’s been a month or two since I made this so I am guessing on the measurements based on the photo I took. But remember, most cooking dishes don't need to be an exact science)

Ingredients

2 Avocados
2 Plum Tomatoes
1/2 Red Onion
Cilantro
1 Lime
Salt and Pepper to taste
Cayenne (if desired)

Steps

Rough chop into similar sizes the avocados, tomatoes and onion
Finely chop cilantro
Add seasonings to taste
Cut the lime in half and squeeze in the lime juice

Serve with scoops.

Guest Post

2012-08-14T15:36:00.000-04:00

No blog post this week kids. I ended up writing a guest post for the ladies at Doing the District. If you're interested, you can check it out here: Where to Date: A Male Perspective

If you're feeling nostalgic, you can always revisit my first post from this site: Grow Something (and not mold)

What's running through her head when she invites you over for dinner...

2012-08-02T11:12:00.000-04:00

A guest post, retro diary by Katie @DateMeDCBlog

Panic.

So you want to know what’s going through our heads when we invite you over for a home-cooked dinner?

The honest answer? Panic. Sheer, utter, ice-cold panic!

I know this may seem hard to believe given our entrenched social mores for traditional gender roles, but when we’re only feeding ourselves, we eat takeout or cereal for dinner, too. And sure, we may also do some cooking for ourselves, but we’re certainly not pulling out the linens and polishing our silver for it. Cooking for one is utilitarian: We’re getting the job of nourishment done.

"...We had at least three monumental freak-out moments prior to your arrival on our doorstep."

But for you, however, it’s a totally different story. If we’re cooking for you, it’s way beyond mere momentary sustenance. We’re letting you into our homes, into ourselves, and we want you to be duly impressed. It may not be politically correct to say this, but if we’re cooking for you, we’re auditioning for the role of wife, and we’re hoping this performance gets us cast in the part.

We may make it look completely effortless, but trust this: We had at least three monumental freak-out moments prior to your arrival on our doorstep.

Allow me to recount for you the minutes of the first time I cooked for my now-boyfriend during what was our second date, and you’ll see exactly what I mean:

5:30 p.m.: I get home from work, and FRANTIC CLEANING COMMENCES. All dirty laundry is removed from my floor and tucked safely in my laundry bin (where, admittedly, it should have been in the first place). Papers and mail are shoved into drawers. Countertops are wiped down with disinfectant.

6 p.m.: I shower and shave my legs, cuz… yeah. Not that I INTEND to sleep with him, but, y’know, shit happens.

6:30 p.m.: I pull out my failsafe cookbook: Better Homes and Gardens New Cookbook. If you don’t own this, go buy it immediately. It has relatively idiot-proof recipes for most basic meals. And tonight’s menu is Chicken Marsala, which I’ve chosen for three reasons: 1. I’ve made it before so I know I can make it; 2. I have the ingredients on hand; and 3. It takes 30 minutes.

6:33 p.m.: Turns out my chicken broth, integral to the recipe, expired two months ago. Well, FUCK! Trek to the grocery store and be late to dinner at my own house, or risk cooking with expired ingredients? It doesn’t smell funny, so I proceed as planned and silently pray that we don’t end the night via barfing.

6:37 p.m.: And I don’t have mushrooms or green onions either. So much for the No. 2 reason to make Chicken Marsala!!! Who the hell is in charge around here?!

6:46 p.m.: It’s decidedly vegetable-free and partially expired, but I get the Chicken Marsala mixture on the stove and start it simmering. I take the opportunity to make my tried-and-true spinach salad, which is a bag of spinach, some feta cheese crumbles, dried cranberries and raspberry-walnut vinaigrette dressing tossed together.

6:52 p.m.: HOLYFUCKINGSHITASSTHATISHOT! Mental note: Stand outside of the range of the bubbling stove because that shit will burn you.

6:55 p.m.: I pop a loaf of Harris Teeter’s take-and-bake French bread into the oven, which automatically makes the meal feel professional. Now, everything just has to finish cooking. My work here is done, and I can relax.

6:56 p.m.: Should I have planned appetizers, or a dessert? Oh well, too late now.

6:57 p.m.: If this guy is put off by the fact that I don’t have appetizers and a dessert, then he’s clearly an asshole who doesn’t deserve me anyway!

6:58 p.m.: Please let him not be an asshole.

6:59 p.m.: One minute until he gets here.

7:01 p.m.: OH MY GOD HE’S NOT COMING.

7:06 p.m.: My phone rings. He’s outside, and not sure which door is mine. I breathe a sigh of relief that my frantic cleaning, shaved legs and broth-burned forearms weren’t all for naught. I open my door, show him upstairs and give him a quick tour of my place.

7:09 p.m.: FUCK, THE BREAD! It’s only supposed to bake for 8 minutes! It’s a dark brown and a little crisp, but not totally inedible. I decide to serve it anyway.

7:15 p.m.: I’ve set the table and served the food, pulling out a jar of peachberry jelly from a farmer’s market to be spread upon the bread.

7:16 p.m.: The rim of the peachberry jelly jar is moldy. Oh please let him not have noticed that. I hop out of my seat and in one swift motion wipe the offending mold off with a paper towel.

"You can learn from this moment, men: Be helpful, even if it’s something small."

So, for those keeping track: Expired chicken broth. Burned bread. Moldy jelly. I look like a real winner here. I imagine the wife casting director: Don’t call us – we’ll call you.

The rest of the meal is eaten without fanfare. It tastes fine – no repercussions from the expired broth or moldy jelly yet – and he seems to be enjoying it. Thank heaven for small miracles.

7:45 p.m.: He clears the table, which I find sweet. You can learn from this moment, men: Be helpful, even if it’s something small. The night moves to the couch, where we sit with our drinks to continue talking.

9:15 p.m.: Aaaaand he’s unhooking my bra. My slapdash meal has not hindered his virility, nor his interest in me. SUCCESS!

Looking back on that night, a few things to note:

No one got sick from anything I made, and he didn’t notice the mold on the jar.
He did, however, notice my shoes in a sloppy pile on the floor near the door. Guess I missed a spot in my cleaning. Oops.

And honestly, the other thing he didn’t notice was how stressful the whole night really was for me! Every part of it was so precariously held together that one false move could have ruined everything. I lucked out that he was fairly punctual; had he been any later, the chicken would have been all dried out. And I’m also lucky that though the clock was ticking on the chicken broth, it apparently can last for a while after its expiration date. In cooking and in relationships, it seems, timing is everything.

So guys, even if the meal is a little haphazard, if she’s cooking for you, it’s not happening by accident. She likes you. She wants to impress you. And she’s probably teetering on the edge of freaking out about it.

Be nice, and clear the table afterward.

"Katie likes her beer expensive, her wine cheap and her foot in mouth." She is the co-author of Doing the District: A Gamma Girls' guide to eating, drinking, dancing, dating and living in the capital city. In a past life, Katie has also authored the popular blog Date me, D.C.!. You can follow her on Twitter at @DateMeDCBlog.

Cook a Classic: White Wine Mussels with Sourdough Bread

2012-07-31T12:32:00.000-04:00

What says "I-know-this-dish-could-possibly-get-you-sick-but-I'm-that-good-that-I-guarantee-you-won't-get-sick-and-you'll-be-extremely-impressed?"

(When in reality, its quite easy to pull off.)

What's classy but not over the top?

What's ballsy but avoids the blow torch?

"Yeah... you know... the local fish monger said that the Prince Edward Island mussels were in season. I thought we'd have a little treat and I'd cook up some fresh mussels with a white wine sauce and some freshly-baked sourdough bread." (In a dead-panned, very casual tone)

Boom. Mussels. The tried and true French classic of white wine mussels accompanied with crispy sourdough bread dish is simple, yet elegant.

She'll be impressed with your ability to add wine to something other than a wine glass, your confidence in cooking shellfish, and your forethought in going to the store the day of to buy fresh seafood.

I won't lie. You can screw this up. And the screw up scale ranges from: "Ooops I forgot to add salt" to "Here, I'll hold your hair back while you throw up the ocean..." But before you stop reading, just stick to these three DO NOT GET HER SICK rules and you'll be fine:

Buy fresh mussels the day of the date! DO NOT tie off that plastic bag in the grocery store! They need oxygen to breathe. They will die!
If you're hand picking the mussels at the store (or sorting through them at home), keep only the ones that are closed and unbroken. They're closed because they are scared, little mussels. Scared, closed mussels = alive mussels. Alive mussels = Success.
After cooking your mussels, throw away the mussels that haven't opened. The theory is that they open up when they're exposed to the boiling liquid/steam. If they're already dead, they wouldn't have that reaction. (This has been up for debate but better to be safe than sorry)

"Do not get her sick" RECAP

Before cooking: Closed, scared mussels = GOOD
After cooking: Open, tasty mussels = GOOD

I feel like we need some sort of mnemonic device...but anyways, on to the recipe:

Recipe
Soup to nuts this dish will take about 10 minutes. It's incredibly quick and simple. The hardest part is just remembering to follow the DO NOT GET HER SICK rules.

1.5 lbs of fresh mussels
White wine (preferably dry, preferably room temperature)
Butter
Salt, Pepper
Onions, Garlic, Shallots (At least some combination of them)
Sourdough bread (Sliced)
1 Large-ish pot for cooking the mussels

Steps:
Prep
DO THIS BEFORE SHE ARRIVES (perhaps 20 minutes beforehand). Girls love to see you cook but they don't enjoy watching you clean seafood. You'll need to clean and de-beard the mussels. Check out the steps here: http://allrecipes.com/howto/cleaning-mussels/. If you are having trouble de-bearding them with your hands, use pliers (but hopefully it shouldn't get to that).

The Mussels

Roughly chop the onions/garlic/shallots
Saute 1/4 stick of butter with the chopped ingredients over medium-high heat.
Saute for a minute or two until fragrant and translucent-ish (doesn't need to be an exact science)
Pour in about a wine glass full of white wine (Lets be honest, guys don't have measuring cups. My rule of thumb is about 1/2"-2/3" of an inch of wine)
Turn up the heat so the wine starts to boil and steam
Throw in the closed mussels
Cover, lightly shake the pot occasionally
Mussels will be in done in 2-3 minutes. I usually do just under 3 minutes. The mussels are done when they open up, but try not to cook past 3-4 minutes, they'll get rubbery.
Remove from heat
Remove mussels from the pot with a slotted spoon (but KEEP THE BROTH) and place into a separate bowl
Throw away the closed mussels
Cover the bowl with foil (we need to keep these warm while we make the broth)

Garlic, Onions, Shallots w/ Butter

Mussels in the pot

Mussels DONE

The Broth and Bread
Who are you kidding? Mussels are great BUT what really brings it together is that tasty, slightly buttery, white wine broth that's soaked up with crispy sourdough bread. If you've followed the recipe above, your broth should be almost there. It should be near perfect, but here is a list of steps to give it a little more love...

Sweet Sweet Broth

Turn the oven to 350 degrees and throw in some slices of sourdough bread
Put the mussel pot back on the stove on High (with the remaining broth from step 10 above)
Add a little bit of wine (1/4 wine glass should do it)
Add another 1/4 stick of butter (don't tell her you're doing this)
Add a few dashes of salt (I like pepper as well)
Stir occasionally and boil down the liquid for a few minutes (tasting periodically)
After a few minutes you're set
Strain (or don't strain) the liquid and pour it over the mussels
Remove bread from oven

Eat and enjoy. Secretly bask in the glory that you're now an esteemed and established cook of French cuisine.

From calzones to pizza: The "art" of homemade pizza

2012-07-10T00:03:00.004-04:00

Don't worry - if the dough sticks, if you forget the flour, if you forget a pizza spatula, a calzone is a perfectly acceptable result...

***

Six years ago, during a rare snow day in DC, my girlfriend at the time and I decided to try and make homemade pizza. Arriving around lunch time, she brought over fresh dough from Whole Foods and an eclectic mix of toppings. Armed with memories from my college summer job at an Italian restaurant and a new pizza stone. We were ready.

Flour down. Oven at 475. Dough? Refusing to stay flat.

Oven preheated. Flour everywhere. Dough? Finally flat, cans of soup at the corners, like turrets on a castle, keeping the dough from contracting...(can you tell we're novices?)

Sauce. Cheese. Pepperoni. Black olives. Onions. Mushrooms. This is going to awesome.

BUT

No one ever tells you that when you're prepping pizza on your counter top, you'll need to somehow transfer said pizza into the oven. Its all fine and good with those ultra thin, sheet metal-like pizza spatulas. But your standard, encyclopedia-level thickness, $15 dollar, wooden spatula would be better suited for kindling.

Wedge. Pull. Knife. Flour. Wedge. Scrape. 1/3 of the pizza down.

The thin pizza combined with the lack of flour on the counter top squished our pizza. Dough was everywhere. Our solution? Go with the flow, finish folding the dough over. CALZONE TIME.

Second effort? Calzone time, part deux....

Fast forward...

But now six years later, its finally pizza time (did it take me six years to learn how to go from calzone to pizza? Yes, although I probably only make pizza about twice a year. But, um...disregard that thought while reading my tips below...)

Making dough is great (and more power to you if you're at this level) but you can't go wrong with store bought fresh dough - I know Whole Foods sells it, other places should as well.

I go "dough to oven" and skip the "counter top middle man" - I have yet to figure out how to get the dough to lay flat on a counter top without it contracting. My first approach was to take some dough, add flour, kind of toss it around, stretch it, maybe use a rolling pin a little bit, and finally take four cans of soup to each of the corners. Once souped up, I'd let the dough sit for a minute or two, and then finally the dough seemed to cooperate. But I'd still be left with the whole counter top-to-oven, calzone problem...

Since then, I've found that my best strategy is to work the dough with your hands, continuing to rotate it like a disc, slowly letting gravity do the work. Once the dough is of proper oblong size, my sous chef pulls open the oven door, and I put the dough directly on the hot pizza stone. This seems to fix my contracting dough problem...

I avoid the "calzone" problem by topping the pizza in the oven - I may lose about a minute or two of heat, but I'll sacrifice that for serving pizza not rolls of dough.

Use a pizza stone AND keep it hot - I preheat my oven to 475 degrees. I avoid cookie sheets. I avoid the metal grates. That $20 pizza stone will give you some incredible crust.

Still attempting deep dish pizza in my cast-iron skillet - I'm almost there. I tried it for the first time (sans internet help) last week. I feel like I'll only need about 3 more years to perfect it.

You don't need a pizza cutter - A cleaver. A chef's knife. All perfectly acceptable slicing tools.

The salad bar is an excellent avenue to forage for toppings that would be too expensive to buy a la carte

The six years in the making "recipe:"

Store bought dough
Sauce
Cheese
Foraged salad bar toppings

Preheat oven to 475
Take a baseball-sized portion of dough and use your best technique to get it pizza-topping-worthy (see my method above)
Cook dough for 2-3 minutes BY ITSELF
During this time, get your sauce, cheese, and toppings prepped and close to the oven
Open the oven, and use a knife to poke out any air bubbles
Prep the pizza while its still in the oven. Shoot for a two minute pit crew time. (The pizza stone just seems wayyy to hot to pull out of the oven)
Close. Timer to 10 minutes. (If you use fresh herbs or other high-heat sensitive toppings, try putting them on with about 3 minutes left)
After 10 minutes check the state of the crust. The crust will tell you everything. (With my oven and two topping rounds, it takes about 16/17 minutes)
Once the crust looks good, use your giant spatula to remove pizza
Transfer to cutting board.
Cut.
Eat.

Four interesting good pizza combinations:

Bacon + Blue Cheese + Red Onion
Black Olive + Pepperoni + Fresh Basil
Black Olive + Tomato + Cilantro + Feta
Tomato + Cilantro + Jalapeno + Red Onion

Beginner Fishing: Pan-fried, Cajun-seasoned Tilapia

2012-06-21T17:11:00.000-04:00

I'm not sure when the misconception that fish is difficult to cook came around but it's amazing how many people tell me they're truly scared of cooking fish. Cooking fish is really not that bad. It's actually quite easy - as long as you cook the fish within a few days of buying it, I will guarantee success the first go-around.

So, let's start with something easy...

Something with butter... (everyone loves food cooked in butter)

Something you can't screw up...

Pan-fried, cajun-seasoned tilapia (or other similar whitefish) anyone?

The ingredients are simple. The cook time is under 10 minutes. The prep time is under 5 minutes. The cost is under $10. Your house won't smell like fish oil. And nearly everyone is impressed when you cook seafood.

This is a beginner recipe. But everyone can embrace its simplicity.

Pan-Fried, Cajun-Seasoned Tilapia Recipe

2 pieces of tilapia
Butter
Cajun Seasoning
Salt and Pepper
Skillet (a Cast-Iron skillet will put a nice crust on the fish)
Shallots (or onions)

Finely chop shallots
Coat the tilapia in salt, pepper, and cajun seasoning
Heat a tablespoon of butter in a skillet on Med-High
Once the butter has somewhat melted, throw in the shallots
After about a minute, put in the tilapia
After 3 minutes or so, flip the tilapia
Remove from heat once the fish becomes flaky

That's it. Pure and simple. Master the pan-fried white fish and we're on our way to being a true seafood champion - soon you'll be shucking oysters....

Guest Post: Baking for Beginners (From scratch...for your date)

2012-06-13T11:18:00.000-04:00

I won't touch baking... I'm terrible at following recipes and feel the need to improvise even if it's after reading the side of the Mac N Cheese box. So here's another guest post from Kate. About baking. With easy-to-follow recipes. It's like reciprocation through...ahem...baking. After you're done reading this post, you can check out her previous guest post here, and her blog (Doing the District) as well. -Matt

While Matt discovered that cooking can really impress a girl, I've learned that baking can really impress a guy.

Whether it's baking a cake for your boyfriend's birthday, cookies to thank a guy friend who did you a favor, or bringing a loaf of homemade banana bread as a host gift when a guy cooks you dinner on a third date, I've only ever received positive feedback when I bake for a guy. They all love it.

I started baking about six years ago (Of course, it all began one night when I was just looking for something mindless to do after a long day spent in the library studying tax law...). I wandered through the baking aisle of the grocery store and bought some pre-packaged cookie mixes.

I baked four dozen cookies that night.

...and promptly gave them all away to guy friends the next day

Three years later and I'm still baking. And now I only bake from scratch. Why? Because it's rewarding to create something on your own and then watch someone you care about enjoy it. To have a stressful day at work but come home and relax in the kitchen with a glass of wine and a new recipe to try out. To wake up early, brew some coffee, mix together some ingredients, pop your creation in the oven and know that ten minutes later your entire house is going to smells cozy. And that when that sleepy guy crawls out of your bed and plops on your couch his eyes are going to light up when you hand him a warm apple and cranberry muffin.

And let me tell you--- it's really not that hard at all, especially if you follow the same mantra that Matt hammers home on this blog: Just make it fun.

One thing to keep in mind though. While I love Matt's theme of cooking without a recipe, you can't really do that with baking. The right amount of flour, sugar, and baking soda can make or break a recipe. That said, here are two (easy) recipes. Both will impress your man, or your potential man. Or even just your guy friends (Or practice baking homemade goods for your dad this weekend to celebrate Father's Day).

Banana Bread*

2/3 cup white sugar
1/4 cup margarine/ butter (melter/ soft)
1 2/3 cup flour
2 eggs
1 cup banana (mashed)
1/4 cup water
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
(You can also add things in like chocolate chips or walnuts)

Pre-heat over to 350 degrees.
Spray loaf pan with non-stick spray. Set aside
Beat sugar and butter until smooth and creamy. Beat in eggs, bananas, and water
In separate bowl, mix the flour, baking soda, baking powder, and salt
Mix in with the other ingredients until well blended
Pour into the loaf pan
Bake for 60-65 minutes until the top has a nice crispy crust

*This is a low fat recipe that I found online and altered slightly. The best part? You cannot tell that it's low fat AT ALL.

Chocolate Chip Cookies

2 cups flour
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 1/2 sticks butter (melted and cooled until warm)
1 cup light brown sugar
1/2 cup sugar
1 large egg plus 1 egg yolk
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1 1/4 cups chocolate chips

Pre-heat oven to 325 degrees
Line two baking sheets with either parchment/ wax paper or spray with non-stick spray. Set aside
Mix the flour, baking soda and salt. Set aside
Mix the butter, sugar, and brown sugar until blended smooth
Beat in the egg, egg yolk, and vanilla
Slowly add the flour mix
Add the chocolate chips last
Scoop pieces of the dough (about two tablespoons) with a spoon and drop on the cookie sheets about 2-3 inches apart
To make sure you are making them the right size, you should make between 18-20 cookies with this recipe
Bake for 15-18 minutes until the cookies are a light brown
Remove the cookies and let them cool on the baking sheets (this allows the centers to cook a little more while the outer edges cool)

Kate is a co-creator and author of Doing the District. You can follow her on twitter at @appealingkate

Cook outside the lines (plus grilling a whole black sea bass)

2012-06-12T12:02:00.000-04:00

Every so often you fall into a rut.

The monotonous chopping on the cutting board.

(Vegetable Tuesdays)

The familiar bing of the numeric keypad on the microwave.

(Frozen Dinner Wednesdays)

4 quarts. 1 tbsp. 8 minutes to boil. 10 minutes to cook.

(Pasta Thursdays)

Although, it's probably not smart to follow your visions of grandeur for that first time you cook for her (Food Network contestants can't pull together a meringue in 30 minutes, so what makes you think you can too??? You're already stressing out about everything else!).

So maybe on that third meal, you step out of your comfort zone. Cook something you've never cooked before. Try something completely new. It may not deliver the same kind of adrenaline as skydiving from a Groupon-promoted, hippie skydiving coop, but it could work for a monotonous Tuesday night.

But be honest, tell her you have no idea what you're doing. Don't be too serious. Make it fun. Have her help you out. Work together.

Notes:

Avoid foods that could get you both sick if you two screw up (lets avoid raw steak tartare, okay?)
Build off of your existing knowledge

Good at grilling? Grill differently
Have made fresh pasta? Try ravioli or flavored pasta

Make it a sliding scale based on your skill

Used to cooking Mac n Cheese? Try sautéing tilapia
Can sear tuna with the best of them? Try shucking oysters
Mastered grilled chicken? Try grilled pizza or a grilled whole fish.
Enjoy sushi? Make it
Roll fresh pasta
Buy a pizza stone

I've definitely failed on a few occasions...

I tried to make squid-ink pasta one time. We bought fresh, whole squids from the fish market, cleaned them, "attempted" to harvest the ink, and then "attempted" to make pasta AND use the squid ink. It failed brilliantly.
But I can assure you, I'll always remember our attempt at squid-ink pasta, and I know she does too.

I couldn't tell you what we ate instead or if we went hungry, but making something different, and together, was all that mattered.

Grilled Black Sea Bass
The other weekend I found myself wandering around the DC Fish Market. Bored with the standard jumbo shrimp and wanting to avoid another failed attempt at squid ink pasta, I settled on a 4 lb. black sea bass. Now I've cooked a whole fish once before, but it had been awhile, and I couldn't remember any of the details, so in my mind, I was starting with a clean slate.

When I cook something for the first time, I usually look up recipes to get some general guidelines. I focus on general cooking times and potential flavor combinations, but usually wing the rest. Try doing the same (use your existing knowledge as the base). Here's what I tried for the sea bass:

My Ad Hoc Sea Bass Recipe

4 lb Black Sea Bass, cleaned and scaled
Salt, Pepper, Olive Oil
Lemon
Fresh herbs
Grill

Things I've learned

Preheat the grill and make sure the grate is hot
Try to flip only once, you'll ruin the skin and risk losing all of the herbs inside if you keep playing with it
Make sure you know what to do with the fish after its cooked (removing the head, bones, etc.)
My electric grill didn't put nearly as enough char on it as I would've liked, so I'm curious to know what a gas grill can do
A whole fish can look and be intense to cook. Gauge her interest. You don't want to gross her out when she sees the cooked fish with those white eyes staring up at her
Have someone else clean the fish (or do it before gets there). Nothing says serial killer more than a first row view at your stellar fish-gutting skills. (DC Fish market will clean fish for $2-3 a fish)

Simple, easy ingredients (per the usual)

Stuff with wholesomeness, coated with olive oil

Grilled. But not as charred as I would've liked. Cooked about 20 minutes on Med-High

Turn off the damn TV

2012-05-17T09:29:00.001-04:00

You wouldn't serve her microwaved TV dinners, so why the hell are you sitting on the couch, in front of the TV, eating that nicely-prepared dinner?

So, I'm hoping this would never happen on the first cooking date, but I'm sure its crept in on future cooking nights. Now that our lives are run by electronics (try avoiding Twitter, Facebook, or Words with Friends at a red light), there occasionally needs to be this unfortunate but necessary reminder that there's more to life than the images smashed behind a glass screen.

So unless its Sunday night and you're busy watching HBO weave together incredible writing, great actors, and random displays of violence and nudity, turn off the TV. Even if you're at the table but the TV's on from across the room - it doesn't count.

Go old school (I can't believe this has turned into old school). Put on some music. Turn off that florescent light. And enjoy your company and the dinner you've just prepared, because you can't DVR life.

Grilled Artichokes

2012-05-14T00:50:00.001-04:00

Sliced, boiled, and ready for the grill

My writing habits are have been withering faster than my failed at attempts at growing green beans on my patio. But I promise to try harder - with more posts and better plant skills (I just purchased jalapenos and banana peppers).

Tonight (like most nights nowadays), I've shunned the stove in favor of the grill. And with feeling energized, I tried grilling two new things: drumsticks (I can't deny that Game of Thrones may have encouraged my desire to eat meat from a drumstick) and artichokes (Trader Joe's has some looking great mid-sized 'chokes that were just calling out to be grilled).

Ingredients

4 mid-sized artichokes (about the size of an orange)
Salt & Pepper
Olive Oil
Lemon

Steps

Wash and Prep the artichokes by:

Cutting the top third of the artichoke off
Chopping the stem in half
Slicing the artichoke in half longways

You'll need to precook these guys before putting them on the grill, so boil the artichokes for about 15 minutes
Strain
Coat the artichokes with olive oil, salt, and pepper
Preheat a grill to med-high/high
Place artichokes on the grill
Char, rotate, char, rotate (~10 minutes)
Slice a lemon and serve

Finished Product