Thursday, September 1, 2011

Competitive Skee-Ball

Now, your mind may jump to the many spinoff leagues in the DC area that are cashing in on the kickball play/party/flipcup/hookup/regret model but that's really not competitive skee-ball.  Or, your mind may jump to you and your buddies making bets on lowest score gets a rail tequila shot, but that's really not competitive skee-ball either.  And soon, you'll arrive to the conclusion that we all eventually reach....THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS F-ING COMPETITIVE SKEE-BALL!


Here I was.

Listening to a young guy berate his date about her pitiful skee-ball playing abilities.  Now, I don't care if she was worse than a President throwing out the first pitch at a ball game, the bottom line is that it doesn't matter.  And being meaner than an in-love, awkward, Third grader at Recess is going to piss her off faster than forgetting her birthday (well, maybe not that bad).  The night will end poorly.  Every time.

But take cues from competitive skee-ball when you're cooking with your date.  There is no competition.  When she's your sous chef (Tip of the Day #1), don't criticize her chopping abilities.  Don't give her that condescending look when she adds 3x times as much salt as you would've expected.  It's like buying flowers, it's the thought that matters (you're actually fucking cooking so she's impressed).

Cooking should not be serious. It should be fun. Accept spontaneity. Accept hiccups. Don't live by the recipe.  It'll be alright, she probably ate beforehand anyways.

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